Children- This is going to cost a lot, and anyone who dares to disagree is going to look like the lead pervert in one of those sexual predator sting programs.
Social- Did I forget to add the suffix -ism? My bad.
Safety- We're adding US$3,000 of hardware and 500 pounds to your car because there are people too stupid to drive sober or buckle a seat belt.
Security- A 12 foot wall engenders a 14 foot ladder, but my butt is covered.
Mandatory Universal Health Care- Does anyone else envision a Republican tapping another "Brownie" to administer this program at some point down the road? No? Great!
The People Have Spoken- My public sodomization was just emceed by Wolf Blitzer, and now I have to praise the individual who just sodomized me.
Illegal Immigration- A way of blaming those uncovered by an unjust law for the very same unjust law. It's like blaming Rosie O'Donnell for not looking good in a thong designed to fit Jessica Alba.
Opposed to Amnesty- The idea that putting ten million taxpayers on the rolls is somehow more costly to the nation than rounding up ten million people and forcing them out of the country.
Family- Appealing to Evangelical Christians.
Urban- Appealing to minorities.
Our Valiant Allies- Those foreign idiots.
My Opponent- The egg-sucking dog at the other dais.
We will continue this fight- I'm screwed.
The struggle must go on- You're screwed.
You're doing a great job- You incompetent twit.
We must start paying our teachers better- It sounds good, but when has any politician ever followed through on this one? Get real.
To enhance safety on our highways- If I really cared about safety on our highways, I would enact a law to pay truckers by the hour, instead of by the mile.
Pro-Choice- A woman has the right to taxpayer money to do what she wants with her body, but if a taxpaying business owner chooses to allow someone to light a Marlboro indoors, she's coming with a fire hose to put it out.
Pro-Life- A child conceived by a man of a fifth grader's dimensions (and intellect) and a woman who looks like a pallet of cottage cheese in a purple Wal Mart muumuu is miraculously going to turn that trailer into the home of Ward and June Cleaver.
We must curb violence and sexuality in the media- In Toronto, The Sopranos are on free broadcast television. In Atlanta, a city of similar metropolitan population, the same program is banned as provoking violence in children. Guess which place has a lower street crime rate.
Racist- The idea that insensitive comments are somehow more worthy of media attention than a genocide in Darfur.
So that's what they mean.
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